got a problem. i\'m a decent, underpaid, hardworking county coroner. it\'s important that my family eat meat at least three times a week. but we just can\'t afford to with the prices the way they are. so i bring home some choice cuts from my autopsy subjects. just mix in the tuna helper¡and ta-da!
the whole family thinks my new meals are delicious. they ask me what\'s my secret. abby, i think they\'re getting suspicious. my smart-ass 8-year-old keeps asking, "where\'s all the meat? the red dye #2 kind that\'s kept in the fridge."
if they find out the truth i don\'t think they\'ll understand. abby, what do i tell my family? dear reaganomics victim: consult your clergyman. make sure the body\'s blessed and everything should be just fine.
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