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adam sandler - cool guy 5

-{sean pulling up in his car to a hooker}-

girl #5: hey, honey.

sean: s'up baby? looking all smooth, standing on the corner at 3 in the morning and shit. you cold, baby? you want to use me as a blanket?

girl #5: i'm just doing my thing.

sean: well, does doing your thing mean your tricky? 'cause i'd like to invest some of my hard earned money towards loving you, if you know what i getting at.

girl #5: well, how much you got, big man?

sean: well, i'm willing to drop 50 dollars on your ass, but there's a condition going on.

girl #5: what's that?

sean: you're going to have to put those lucious lips of yours on... my... slub-a-dub.

girl #5: ooh, i can do that.

sean: you can?

girl #5: mm-hmm.

sean: you mean, you ain't going make fun of the fact that i called my gizza-gazza a "slub-a-dub"?

girl #5: honey you can call your thing what ever you want to as long as you got 50 bucks.

sean: oh sna-- well, alright then here's the 50 dollars, -{unzips pants}- and here's my flip stick, now start wetting that thing up.

girl #5: -{opens his door}- sir, you are under arrest.

-{police car pulls up}-

sean: you got to be fucking with mind here.

girl #5: no, i'm not.

cop: good job denise. we'll take him from here.

-{cop hand cuffs sean}-

sean: what?!?! you going to arrest my ass for trying to get a ride on my slip 'n' slide? fuck that shit.

girl #5: hey honey,when you get to jail, you're going to be on the other end of a slip 'n' slide, and i hope you enjoy yourself.

sean: wwwwhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaattt?!?!?!

-{cop throws sean in back of police car}-

cop: just get in the back, asshole.

girl #5: -{from outside}- you sick fuck.

sean: damn!! -{crying}- this is a bunch of bullshit!!!

peeper: piss on me. -{also in the back of the police car}-

sean: what?!

peeper: please, piss me.

sean: no!!!

peeper: just a tinkle.

sean: fuck that, keep him away from me.

peeper: urine.

sean: keep this man away from me.

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